10:36 a.m. - 2013-10-06
Well I wanted him to like me. In fact I would have don'e just about anything to change the outcome and have him think there could even be the possibility of a future together. The reality is NOPE. He either has someone else or he just isn't interested. Either way he hasn't responded back well though he has answered a few emails most of them have had some question and very few have had no answer at all. So ya I am kind of disappoints. I use to never have problems gaining a guys attention, turning him on and getting him to notice. But I'm not what I use to look like and I just fell flat on my face really. And it hurts. Not only because I like him and he doesn't like me back, but because he would have been a good catch and my self esteem just fell flat. :(. Crap he really doesn't like me this sucks!
Anyways on another interesting note Bishop Terry is now in Newbury today. Um ya. Bishop Bob was suppose to be here and he didn't show... Question is why? Other then he thinks they will give him a hard time... They will dont worry. It would be ackward but I thought they might finally get passed this whole issue... nope they are still stuck. Well maybe though I hate to say it but they took Bishop Bob off his high pedistal. And he would do well to learn some humbleness anyways. I didn't do anything to him or the parish accept to work hard... Lot of good that did at all. Well their priest is now leaving.., congratulations here you go again. Shakes head. So that's life. I haven't worked for 3 1/2 years of the almost 5 years I have been out of ministry. I got a second masters degree. I got straight As and I could not have done better then I had and basically it sucks.
So no winning the guy and no winning back my career calling. How nice. :(
Some days I just hate being around. Good thing Steve tries to keep it together because the reality is I'm tired of being hurt.
Ps I should add that I am proud oft self that I went for a 1/2 hour walk onto own yesterday. That is the second time in just over a week as I went last weekend too. Now that I found this new trail in Strathroy though I think I wil be there more often as I like the woods and walking through it was fun.,I just wish I could see more if the water there too. But at least it is local and easy to get to. :). I am determined in 6 months when Richard might be back that I am going to look better then I do not no matter what. Even if he never comes it gives me something to aim for. I want to be you get and sexy again not old and blah like I have been lately. Time to make some changes I think. Also no more junk food or at least very little... That has to go and I know that will make a difference. It's his loss but mine to as I think it would have been good. :( men. :(
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